Maniac Behind The Wheel!!!
by Noah
Disasters are a magnet to Donald Trump. He just starts kissing them. Big or small, he knows they draw eyeballs. To that end, it's obvious that, if he could, he'd set up campaign events at the historical moments depicted in the above cartoon.
Trump was probably the kid who was always the first in his neighborhood to run down to the car crash on the corner. "No one gets to a car crash faster than me! That I can tell you! People are saying no one gets to a car crash faster!!!" I'm sure he spent a lot of time stealing stop signs, right? Ah, but that was then and this is now! I'm sure he would love to do a rally at a modern day Hindenburg crash even if the thing was full of his fellow Nazis. No one matters to a psychopathic, not even your friends. He's truly "The Pride of the Republican Party." A rally at the sinking of the Titanic? God, that was a missed opportunity! The extinction of the dinosaurs? I'd pay good money to see a couple of T-Rex fight over him! Chomp away, guys! Who gets the tie? Who gets the loaded diaper?
Alas, poor Trump! He will always strive to be immortalized even if his efforts mean there's no one left to know what he did. He's no doubt working on the extinction of humankind. We know that, but, until then, he has to create what he proudly sees as mini-disasters, hence, what he's done to Springfield, Ohio. I mean, he'd still really like to dispense with the election and just be reinstalled by his court pals. He spent over two years trying that one. We also know he'd like to do the J6 thing again, this time with guns, but that's kind of a logistical problem right now. Those things are too big. He's stuck thinking just a little smaller. I'm sure he thought of getting his sons jobs as air-traffic controllers but I guess that'll have to wait until if and when he gets back in the White House. He did give the Russians some Top Secret Israeli intelligence the last time so I'm sure he's pleased at how that's worked out. God knows what he gave Putin at Helsinki, too. Damn, and there's all those stolen documents. Don't forget that Mein Kampf Project 2025. Yeah! "Terminate the Constitution!" That's an idea Trump can get behind! He's already presented that as a bigly campaign item. Sometimes he says he has nothing to do with Project 2025 but that's said with a big orange-faced wink. It's definitely a very personal campaign item for him. It's written by his key advisors and it definitely appeals to his party. They see a reich as a bigly plus. For them, it's some kind of sex dream.
But what about the smaller things? Reagan knew about this kind of campaigning, too. When he launched his 1980 campaign, he announced it in Philadelphia, Mississippi. No, not Philadelphia, PA where the founding fathers came up with our democracy. Reagan chose the Philadelphia in Mississippi because it was the location of 3 1960s Civil Rights workers being murdered and buried in an earthen dam. Reagan knew the message that was sending. He knew that would appeal to Republican voters and get the whole Republican machine behind him; the Republicans that run the corporate media, the banks, and Wall Street, too.
So, what's next for Trump? More Springfields? Another Charlottesville, complete with a ceremonial "lighting of the tiki-torch" and a nice "very fine people" speech? Those are equal to Reagan's racist Mississippi move, but he wants top billing in his party. What to do? How to top Reagan in outrage, any kind of outrage at all? He can't issue another Camp David invite to his Taliban buddies right now. He's already given us Supreme Court Justices that are literally killing women and has committed to providing more of the same. Psychopathic presidents appoint psychopaths to the courts. What else? He's already insulted the Congressional Medal Of Honor and those who've received it. He's already done Arlington Cemetery. He's already taken his new 9/11 truther gal pal, Laura Loomer, to the 9/11 memorial... Ah, here 'tis! Here's another outrage Trump or his advisors have probably thought of: Of course, Trump would cynically use the excuse that Martin Luther King was a Republican (before the effects of Tricky Dick's "southern strategy), but could a rally speech from the balcony of MLK's room at the Lorraine Motel be in the works? Oh how Republican voters would cheer! A Reagan for the 21st Century!!! Yay!!!
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