by Noah
If I had a billion dollars...
If I had a billion dollars I'd think of some good works I could do with such money but I'd also indulge myself in a bit of semi-frivolous revenge in the form of torment for the nation's #1 Psychopath, and why not, I could certainly rationalize it as a good work. Read on.
I would do a deal with the creator of tonight's meme and have it painted on the sides of buildings all across this great land. I would have cameras project it onto the facades of Trump buildings, at least until they go into receivership. I would blow it up to billboard size, very large billboard size and buy the display space for its placement along every highway that has billboard space. Eyeballs, baby! It's about the eyeballs! I would surround Mar-a-Lago with a ring of my Trump Loser billboards!
And we know he loves to watch TV. We know he loves to see how much his rancid name is mentioned. He loves to be the whining little rodent that he is when he sees coverage he doesn't like. Every commercial break would feature my Trump Loser ad! Sometimes, you'd see it in those endless car commercials as the shiney new cars wind through a city's streets. You'd even see it perched on top of taxis in their ads; on the sides of buses too! Happy pedestrians would be wearing it on t-shirts. It would be in product placement shots in movies. Then, there'd be a phase two; just the visual while Johnny Cash sings "I've Been Everywhere." I'd do one with a "Route 66" theme, too.
I'd talk state lottery commissions into issuing a Trump Loser scratch off game. The lines to get one would be 'round the block. I would send Trump's entire grifter family coffee (covfefe) mugs painted with the Trump Loser image. The merch possibilities are endless. It would be the one thing with the Trump name that didn't lose money. And, I would give the money raised by selling Trump Loser merch to worthy causes. At last, something good would come from the misery of his very existence.
Oh, and Donnie, go ahead and have your inept whacked out "legal team," headed up by America's #1 Goth Comedian, sue me if I plaster Trump Loser all over the place. I'd have a billion dollars for real, and I could afford more and much better lawyers than you.
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