Señor Trumpanzee has a lot on his cognitively-impaired mind lately, including his collapsing finances, not the least of which is the fake little bond for $175 million keeping the state of New York from seizing his assets. Trump fan Arthur Engoron will hold a hearing tomorrow on the validity of the bond. Also plaguing poor Señor T lately: all that stinky farting in court and the unfair courtroom sketch artist. That stems from him being unable to stay awake when he’s coming down from drugs, and the artist drawing him while he dozes, drooling on himself. (He also wants to kill Maggie Haberman for writing this in the NY Times: “He didn’t pay attention to a note his lawyer passed him. His jaw kept falling on his chest, and his mouth kept going slack.”) He’s been telling associates that the court artist is “out get him... Trump has critiqued the sketches of him that have circulated in the media this week, and insisted some of the images were likely drawn to make fun of him. One such sketch captured Trump snoozing, with his eyes closed and head tilted.”
[Señor T] has also voraciously monitored the media and entertainment coverage of the trial. He appeared especially upset with Jimmy Kimmel, the comedian and ABC late-night host who has been commenting on the trial with relish, and whom Trump has long despised— to the point that, as Rolling Stone reported, he tried to get his White House staff to pressure Disney, which owns ABC, to force Kimmel to stop making fun of him.
“Stupid Jimmy Kimmel, who still hasn’t recovered from his horrendous performance and big ratings drop as Host of The Academy Awards, especially when he showed he suffered from TDS, commonly known as TRUMP DERANGEMENT SYNDROME, to the entire World by reading on air my TRUTH about how bad a job he was doing that night,” Trump wrote on Wednesday, referring to Kimmel reading one of Trump’s posts criticizing him during the Oscars last month. Trump added that Kimmel pulled off a “CLASSIC CHOKE” job by fumbling the Best Picture announcement, confusing the host with Al Pacino.
Trump, sources recount, has also been savagely annoyed about some of the rejected jurors— and the memes and social-media mockery that they posted that he was forced to engage with in court. Jury selection wrapped up on Friday, but dozens were dismissed over posts they had made roasting Trump or after admitting they could not be impartial.
The court dismissed one potential juror after Trump’s legal team had flagged their social media post last month of an AI-generated video featuring Trump saying “I’m dumb as fuck.” Trump’s lawyers sought to strike another potential juror over social media posts made or shared by her husband in 2016. In one, Trump’s head is in the hands of a character from The Simpsons. In another, Trump is pictured next to former President Barack Obama with a comment about how this is not what was meant by “Orange Is the New Black.” A third post was set in the theme of “The Avengers Unite Against Trump.” While the challenge failed, the woman was ultimately dismissed.
Judge Juan Merchan reprimanded Trump for being “audible” and “gesturing” within 12 feet of a juror who was asked to explain a social media post showing people celebrating Biden’s 2020 win. “I will not have any jurors intimidated in this courtroom,” Merchan said before directing the defense team to counsel their client on his behavior.
Trump has also, of course, been publicly wailing about several aspects of the trial, including the “freezing” temperature in the courtroom; the jury selection process, which he seemed to think allowed his team the ability to blackball an “unlimited” number of prospective jurors; and the expansive gag order Merchan imposed on Trump in the wake of Trump repeatedly attacking his daughter on social media.
Trump was especially incensed about the order Friday morning. “People are allowed to speak about me and I have a gag order, just to show you how much more unfair it is,” he ranted to reporters outside the courtroom, before calling the people who continue to talk about him “real scum.”
To those who’ve known Trump for a long time, or who used to work for him, it’s no surprise that the gravity and process of this criminal trial would uniquely, severely grate on him.
“I was actually just thinking this morning about how cold [Trump] kept complaining to be yesterday. In his normal world, someone would have jumped up and run, not walked, to get the temperature perfect for him,” says Stephanie Grisham, Trump’s former White House press secretary who fell out with him years ago. “This entire experience must be beyond uncomfortable for him, not just the fact that it dives into such personal details, but he has absolutely no control for probably the first time since he was a young child.”
Grisham adds that Trump being on trial this week “reminded me that not only in the White House, but every facet of his life— be it at Mar-a-Lago or Trump Tower or Bedminster— he has a group of people that cater to his every whim. At Mar-a-Lago, people literally stand and applaud him just for walking into the room, and in court, he has to sit there quietly while some people talk about how much they don’t like him. I can’t imagine how hard it has been for him not to get up and storm out of the place like a five-year-old.”
He’ll have plenty more chances to do just that, as opening arguments don’t even begin until Monday. Judge Merchan warned Trump this week, however, that if he misbehaves or skips out on the proceedings, he’ll be subject to arrest. Trump said he understands.
And that brings us to the final thing I imagine in Trump’s mind during his fitful naps during the first in a series of criminal trials: Bennie Thompson (D-MS). Thompson was the chair of the House committee— now disbanded by the Republicans the instant they got the majority— to get to the bottom the attempted coup and J-6 insurrection. On Friday, Thompson introduced a bill that would strip Secret Service protection of any former executive convicted of a felony. That would make it a lot less complicated to incarcerate Trump. I imagine members are rushing to sign on to H.R. 8081, the “Denying Infinite Security and Government Resources Allocated toward Convicted and Extremely Dishonorable (DISGRACED) Former Protectees Act” as co-sponsors. There are 7 original cosponsors: Barbara Lee. (D-CA), Frederica Wilson (D-FL), Yvette Clarke (D-NY), Bonnie Watson Coleman (D-NJ), Jasmine Crockett (D-TX), Joyce Beatty (D-OH) and Steve Cohen (D-TN).
Thompson: “Unfortunately, current law doesn’t anticipate how Secret Service protection would impact the felony prison sentence of a protectee— even a former President. It is regrettable that it has come to this, but this previously unthought-of scenario could become our reality. Therefore, it is necessary for us to be prepared and update the law so the American people can be assured that protective status does not translate into special treatment— and that those who are sentenced to prison will indeed serve the time required of them.”